Do you really want to become a journalist?
This was the question my mom asked when I finally decided to study in Mindanao State University- Marawi campus in Lanao del Sur. Also the same question my journalism instructor said when I first had my major subject under her. Friends, relatives, people who don’t even matter asked the same question everytime they came to know the career path I chose. And now, I just heard the same question when I first had my presence at SunStar Davao.
Ma’am Estella Estremera, the Editor- in- Chief of SunStar, asked me together with the aspiring interns of MSU, “Do you really want to become a journalist?”
I have always been confident with my answer ever since, “Yes, I do!”
But this time, it was different even with the same answer. I had a little chill and a little pinch inside my stomach that makes me uncomfortable. I looked back and saw the little girl who dreamed to be seen on television reporting relevant news to the society. Then a lady who hoped to write on daily newspapers and see her name just right below her work. And a young woman who became scared to her own aspiring dream.
Little by little, I came to understand that journalism is not just about being good in grammars and writing (and I’m not even good at it). It’s not just about knowing, but understanding. It is not about informing the public, but keeping the public involved and comprehend on the issues of the society.
I came from a University where I can say was a perfect picture of small Philippines. There were people considered to be on the highest level of societal status (we call them elites), there were also from the moderate sector and majority was considered below the poverty line. Robbery, vehicular accidents, kidnapping, rape, murder, corruption, etc. Crimes happen almost everyday inside the campus but there were no records and no justice from all of those. As a campus journalist, I become observant to the obvious happenings in my surrounding and I write on those issues again and again. Sometimes I get tired, I feel that no one cares even if everyone knows. But I cannot stop myself from writing what was true, what was real. My ideals on becoming someone relevant to the society keeps me going to call for justice and change even if it scares me. People close to me suggested that I shouldn’t stress myself out from those issues, rather enjoy my student life. Others say I was too idealistic. But I said to myself, if I won’t write about it, who else will?
Campus journalism was really a great help for me to cope up on my job. But there were still times I don’t even know what I’ll do and where I’ll go. It’s very frustrating especially that I still have to know what’s going on in this big city. The pressure of meeting deadlines, asking right questions and becoming an ‘instant expert’ to each assigned topic sometimes is agonizing. The feeling of being so stupid and the inferiority from other trained journalist is tapping my back, disturbing me. But I realized, in my first week of experience, that these trained people were also once was like me. They learned through time.
Being scared of your own dream is an odd thing and realizing it when it’s all too late is even scarier. Having my experience as an intern on this On the Job Training required by our school gives me a sneak peek on the blurry image of the future. Should I step forward? Will I be brave enough to face my scary dream? What if I fail? A lot of thoughts entered my head and I understand that my choice affects my future.
Another learning was ahead of me, and a bit of it, like a trailer of a movie, was given: A journalist shouldn’t just write about bad news, the world has a lot to offer and people get fed up facing it everyday. Politics, war, crimes –I was drowned with stories like these to the point that I forget the other side of the coin. Success story is not a bad idea, people love reading what makes them feel proud. News is everywhere, bad or good. By just writing a story with objectivity and in- depth understanding makes one a journalist. The journey is still a long way, and learnings are still to come.
Now, “Do you really want to become a journalist?”
Even if there’s chill and pinch on my stomach everytime I say ‘yes’, I will still say ‘YES’.
thegirloncelost 